LYNN'S JOURNEY

Hospital Update

2010-03-29T08:03:00.000-05:00

Waiting for the news today. We are hoping daddy is well enough to move to Promise (rehab hospital) today. Last night his fever went back up to 101.2 and wouldn't break. It is fiinally down to 99.9 this morning. Waiting on the doctor to give us report. My life is on hold right now - can't think of anything that is more important than sitting by his side and holding his hand.

Daddy's Hospitalization

2010-03-26T16:00:00.004-05:00

The last few days have been a whirlwind. To document the progression, I am going to try to recap the events.
The call came from WVH at 5:00am that daddy was being transported to WKBC with 103 temp and throwing up. ER evaluation showed slightly elevated blood sugar, low oxygen saturation, heart murmer, urinary tract infection, and double pneumonia.
Antibotics were started and zofran but he continued vomiting throughout the day. The added pheregran and the vomiting slowed and last episode was about 9pm on Wednesday night.
Thursday night the test results came in, infection is clearing fine, breathing treatments were started to clear up fluid in lungs. First treatment resulted in low BP and high pulse rate. The BP stabilized, pulse did not. Luckily the doctor was on the floor and ordered cardizem push, pressure began to come down and doctor ordered him to the stepdown ward so he could have cardizem drip added to iv to keep pulse rate under control.
Friday the swallow test was conducted. 1st stage showed he aspirates liquids. This is the most probable cause of the double pneumonia. Since 2nd stage is necesssary, the doctor ordered more nutrition in the IV until we can beginfoods. 2nd stage swallow test which is done with x-ray to visualize the esopoghas during the swallowing process was conducted and the speech therapist recommends pureed foods and thick liquids.
Fever broke today and blood count looks good.

Sad day today

2010-02-11T15:23:00.004-06:00

Daddy has been at the WVH since March 4, 2009. He as very anxious at first but for the most part, he has been content. Today he was anxious, looking from side to side, moving around in his chair. Ethelyn had shared that he was acting stubbon last week, and he was that today and more. He didn't want us to move his chair to the table to eat, he wanted to get away. I asked him what he wanted and he looked at me with sad eyes and asked "Where am I?" I was shocked. I tried to tell him and he said "Help me".

He never smiled today.

He did eat his lunch but with no emotion and said nothing else until I got ready to go. I told him I love him and he asked "Who are you?" These are questions he has never verbalized before. I asked the nurse if his pills - especially the "Remember" pill has changed and she said no - nothing.

I left him sitting in his chair in the dining room, a confused look on his face. I cried when I got into the car. I go back tomorrow and I hope he has a better day.

Daddy's Day Out

2010-02-02T14:00:00.002-06:00

Ethelyn, Ken and I took daddy out to FBC to attend the 70th wedding anniversary of Olan and Mae Wise. Daddy and Olan have been friends for a long time. Daddy had a great time!

Pictures:
Daddy and Carl Kelly, his Sunday School teacher and golf buddy when daddy and mama played golf at Palmetto CC in the 80's.
Ken and Daddy. I am so blessed to have such a caring husband. Ken is so good with daddy - patient and loving.

The star of the day Olan Wise with daddy and Ethelyn. Mae suffers from Alzheimer's and we couldn't get her engaged enough to join in the picture. Ethelyn was trying to hold daddy back. Daddy was ready to get up and walk - and he did! What a wonderful day it was.

Victory at the WVH

2010-01-29T17:04:00.002-06:00

It looks like Governor Jindal has heard our voices. We will get to keep our Doctor until the budget is made in July --- we need to keep fighting to get the needed positions funded in the next fiscal year.

Daddy was very distant today. Few laughes, fewer smiles, but he seemed at peace and not anxious which means a good day for an advanced Alzheimer's patient.

The picture today if of Daddy at his 77th Birthday party in September. The family got together to be with him on this special day. I like this picture because he usually doesn't feed himself --- but as you can see - he had no trouble with the birthday cake. I wish I would have taken a picture of the tablecloth when he was finished. I just love seeing him happy.

Meeting with Lane Carson

2010-01-26T23:40:00.007-06:00

The meeting ------------------- well all I am going to say at this point is UUUUGGGGHHHHH! If you have been reading my blog all along, you must know how frustrated I felt when daddy was placed in a geri-chair and I was fighting to get him up, walking and in a regular wheel chair so he could use his legs. I feel almost as frustrated now. There - enough said - I am still fighting.

I am posting a picture today that I shows what a difference a familar voice means to daddy. I didn't realize this until I got home and looked back at some pictures I took of him. Again I found him in the hall -- sitting --- staring into space as usual. I talked to him as I approached him and you will see the expression on his face in the first picture. The second picture was snapped as I told him "The Pest is here -- I'm your Winona Lynn and I love you" The picture I took was just the beginning of the wide grin he produced. He turned, laughed and he took my hand. We walked around the wing, singing. He was very happy today, laughing, humming, and very loving. It is days like this that keep me going --- I love my daddy.

January 23, 2010

2010-01-23T21:23:00.002-06:00

I am trying to link up to facebook as a method of keeping everyone updated on daddy. I will post an album on facebook that will contain pictures that chart his progression. This past week was a sad one, I have cut my visits down to 2-3 times a week and he really seems to have progressed a lot. I will take pictures this next week.

Tuesday's visit - He was sitting in the common room, wide awake and staring into space. I came from behind and gave him a kiss on the cheek and got no response. It was not until I got within inches of his face that he acknowledged someone was there, but not response as to who I was. I began to sing our songs, told him I was his Winona Lynn, gave him a kiss and he began to smile. The rest of our visit was quiet, but he did hold my hand all through lunch. He ate well today at lunch but Ethelyn called to say he did not eat hardly any dinner ---- no problem since he has gained so much weight since he went in. He has lost 3 of the pounds he gained, but we are not worried.

Wednesday's visit - He was a mess today, his hair was all messed up, clothes untidy - a sure sign that his breakfast, bath, and morning was not smooth. He refused to eat in the dining room so we went to a side room and ate with good ole gospel music playing in the background. I sang to him before the meal arrived and he smiled and hummed some of the hymns. He seemed to calm down and ate well. He even "talked" during the meal, I sure wish I could understand his words. He laughed and I laughed with him. After the meal, one of the wives put on some Fats Domino and began dancing with her husband and I couldn't resist. I took daddy by the hands and "danced" with him. We hugged a lot, laughed alot and I think I wore him out. After a few monents, he took me by the hand and we walked around the wing. As we got close to the nurses station he looked up at me, laughed and gave kissing noises with his mouth. I kissed him and told him I love him and he said "See ya later". I guess he was ready for me to go ----

Ethelyn called to say she would be there Friday for lunch so I missed my "Friday with Daddy" this week. I will go down there either Sunday or Monday to check on him.

I'm Back!!!!!

2009-11-10T05:26:00.002-06:00

I have been gone for so long I forgot how to log in! It is now 5:26 in the morning, but I was so determined to get started again I refused to sleep. Now, we'll see how the rest of my day goes.
Daddy is going well. We had a support group tonight and I am concerned about Ethelyn. I know she will be fine, she is so independent and strong, but I wish she could rest more. I miss her being here and I wish I could do more for her. Joanna came to visit and she was so happy during that time. It was great to see her back to her old cheerful self. I know it is hard on her, and I wish I could do more.
I have a Women's Ministry meeting at the house tonight and Eric is coming in around midnight so I guess I better get some clothes washed and floors vacuumed before work UGGGGGGHHHH. If time permits, I will post some new pictures. They have been collecting over what --- 3 1/2 months now. Wow it has been a while.

Sad, Busy, Week

2009-07-21T07:50:00.002-05:00

I am so torn this week. So much is going on. I am getting ready for a vacation but still working - and trying to do 2 weeks worth of work at a time. I have a support group visit this morning, and VBS every evening until 8:30. I am going by to see daddy after the support meeting. I am so sad when I think I will be gone a whole week without seeing him. It really hurts when I can't see for myself how he is doing. I can't see his smile, I can't look into his eyes and let him know that I am still there for him. I know he will be taken care of, that is not my concern. I am concerned that when I come back, he will not reach out to me. He may not have that familiar grin when he hears my voice. I have to make time this week. I have to push myself to save what can be done at home until the late night hours so I can go see him. I can get by with just a few hours of sleep. My prayers for the next few days will be for strength.

Morning with Daddy

2009-07-17T21:11:00.003-05:00

Today was Friday - my morning with daddy was one of those rollercoaster mornings.

Daddy has been very quiet, only making unintelligable noises for the most part all week. Staring in space. He has even started pulling your hand to his mouth and instead of giving you a kiss, he shows his teeth as if to bite. This is the same thing grandma did when she was going through this journey. The last time I talked to Dr. Fleniken in the hall, he just said it was the progression and not an increase or change in his meds. He told me he may stop talking at any time.

During the visit, the activities director tried to get daddy to respond to some simple commands and he just stared into space - no response. Daddy's friend Ken from the Purple Heart came to visit, and again - no response. During lunch -no response, although he did eat well. When I left, I went through the same routine. Telling daddy I would be back, how much I enjoyed the time we had together and the usual "I love you daddy". I was hoping to hear the usual response "I love you too baby" but he surprised me! His response today was "You know I love you" I was so shocked, happy and it made my whole day! Thank you Jesus for answering my prayers today. I really needed to hear him put some new words together.

July 4th

2009-07-17T21:01:00.003-05:00

Ethelyn, Ken, and I picked up daddy and brought him to the house for the 4th. He had a wonderful day. The day before was tough and I was worried about how he would do. On that Friday he had forgotten how to eat. He would suck his french fries down whole and was confused about when to swallow and when to chew. He was emotional and I was worried.

On the 4th, he did very well moving from the chair to the car and was extremely talkative during the day. The nurses had given him his meds earlier in the day so he was much more alert by mid-afternoon. He even walked a short distance in the house without a walker. That was very good to see. He only had one accident and Ethelyn and I took care of it quickly so there was no problems. I hope to get him out more in the future.

Found Time to Make Cards

2009-07-17T20:57:00.002-05:00

These cards were made for Father's Day and a member of my church that became a Great-Grandmother in June.

Daddy loves Music

2009-07-17T20:48:00.004-05:00

Daddy's ability to communicate is really starting to slow down. This picture is of him in June during a music concert at the WVH. He will occassionally mouth the words to the old-time gospels. Music is his favorite entertainment.

The home was serving slushies to the residents. This day, Ethelyn was feeding it to him and after a while, he shivered and said "OOOO that is cold". These seldom phrases are so precious to us.

Time to Sort My Feelings

2009-07-17T17:22:00.003-05:00

It was been a while since I posted. So much has happened and yet so much is the same. I am learning to sort through the rollercoaster of emotions that are a part of this journey. I have come to terms with some misconceptions in my life. I am at peace now.

Ethelyn and I will continue to care for daddy as his caregivers and I appreciate her devotion to daddy more and more every day. I believe we make a secure loving team as we devote our time to daddy. We will see that Daddy feels loved every day. Seeing that he is comforted by our smiles, our touch, our voices means the world to us. I am more committed to being there with him through this journey in his life. I consider it a privledge and I will not expect anyone else to understand - for only Ethelyn and I can truly understand the ups and downs of the rollercoaster - because we are there. We will cry, we will be tired, we will be emotionally drained a lot of the time - but the smiles and touches of daddy are worth every visit. I have to let go and not waste my life energy wondering about others. Daddy will get all my energy from this day forward.

I am so blessed to have Ken. He cares for daddy and understands the journey. He is very supportive and will always be there to hold my hand when I don't think I can go on.

Eating trouble

2009-06-27T09:46:00.003-05:00

For the past week Ethelyn has been telling me about daddy spitting out his food. He has done this on occassion when I fed him, but I always felt it was because he didn't like the taste of texture of the food. For example, he seems to always spit out carrots, and hard to chew meats. Yesterday the meal was seafood gumbo. I knew to bypass the meats but he didn't like the gumbo at all. He pushed it all out with his tongue. I tried to crumble up his corn bread so it wouldn't be so soupy, and he did better. I managed to get him to eat all his cornbread, 1/2 the gumbo, NO carrots, and all of this pudding. He spit out some of his milk, but drank most of it. I know he is gaining weight so I am not concerned. I feel for the moment it is his decision not to eat, not the inability to eat. His activity is so little, I know his calorie demand is small, but I do want to keep track of his eating for future reference in case it does become an issue.

Father's Day cards

2009-06-24T21:17:00.003-05:00

These are the cards I made for Ken and his dad for Father's day. I recently got a "Big Bite" grommet gun. I am learning to use it. I really like what it adds to the cards. You can get grommets in different shapes, colors, etc. so I imagine I will be using them on cards in the future. The blue card was for Ken, and the brown with green ribbon was for his dad.

Calming down

2009-06-24T20:54:00.005-05:00

With all the excitment of the past few weeks, things are finally calming down. Daddy was in a good mood today. When I got there he was sitting with his back to the door and a volunteer was reading to the residents and doing mind puzzles with them. Needless to say, daddy was not interested. I came up behind him and hugged his neck. When I looked at him, he smiled real big, gave a laugh and said "There you are". I got a BIG hug and we spent the morning holding hands, walking (he was in his chair) and he talked and talked. I could only understand about half the words and the content did not make any sense, but I got to hear his beautiful voice, and I was happy.

The pictures were taken last month when Jared came for Ken's big 50th Birthday. I chose them because it shows how much daddy love to go outside for walks. There is a pond at the home that has ducks and he likes to go there. It is getting too hot to go out now, he gets hot very easy. The picture below looks sad. He wants to go outside, and doesn't understand that it is too hot. He does go out on the patios of the unit for some outside time, but it takes a while to walk over to the pond. I have some pictures of daddy by the garden that was planted by the residents that I will post tomorrow.

Music and Care Meeting

2009-06-19T23:16:00.005-05:00

The pictures today were taken while we were attending a music performance from the "Sterling Silver Saints" from Gladewater Texas. They sang a variety of gospel, bluegrass, and patriotic songs. Daddy had a good time - Music and slushy - What more could anyone ask for?

The meeting with all daddy's care givers was yesterday and it went well.

A summary of the meeting:

*The sores are healed - The open sore closed quickly and no infection resulted - thank goodness. He will continue to be put to bed after lunch every day.

*He is moving well in the chair and even going for short walks with the walker - when he feels like it. The RN supervisor has put in a order for the CNA supervisor on the 4th wing to walk him every day because she has training in restorative therapy. This is what Ethelyn and I have been wanting for so long ---- God is so good. I will continue to work with him as well.

*He is eating very well - he has gained 10 pounds since March 4th. Hopefully he will get some exercise to work off some of the calories he is taking in. They really do feed them all day, and the meals are pretty large. He is not feeding himself as much as he was, but he does take the initiative at times.

*His meds have been adjusted and he is more alert in the day, not as agitated, and he is sleeping well at night.

I am also working on getting together a support group through the Alzheimer's Association that will meet at the home for the families. Since daddy has been in, several in the unit have passed away. Ethelyn and I got to know one family and it was hard. Another patient has been given a short time from the doctors. It is feeling more and more like losing a member of your own family - when one family hurts, we all hurt. Such a sad disease, this long good-bye. But in all things God has a purpose. I know God has not forgotten daddy, his life situation has taught me so much about life, about myself, and about my God. Even though he can not communicate through words, he is still teaching me something everyday.

A few of my cards

2009-06-18T23:20:00.005-05:00

During the past month, I have found a little time to make a few cards. The "Winnie the Pooh" was one of my first cards. I made it to send with a bubble mower we sent to Georgia. The purple and gold cards were made for graduation gifts for students at BHS and LSU that were graduating. As luck would have it, the colors are purple and gold and both were tigers so I embossed them with paw prints. The Green one was for Impact Benton sponsors. I embossed them with hands and feet since Impact Benton was about being the "Hands and Feet of Jesus". The emblem I framed is the logo of Impact Benton. It is blurring but on the parish map it marks Benton. On the tools are the words loving and serving.

I made another card to celebrate our pastors 16 years at FBC but I guess I didn't take a picture. I used the SCAL to cut a silhouette of a preacher at the pulpit - the colors were blue and brown, and I embossed the card with swiss dots and cut edges with the Fiskars threading water punch.

My picture taking has not improved, but my craft storage has. I have most of my supplies in one area so hopefully I will be able to make more cards and improve with each one. It would be nice to make my Christmas Cards this year, but that is way over my skill level right now!

More Pictures

2009-06-18T21:39:00.004-05:00

Big Day for Ethelyn

2009-06-18T21:03:00.006-05:00

Yesterday was a big day for Ethelyn. She finally got a car that fits her small frame. Although she loves the truck, it really was a lot of truck for her to drive around. It was always a sight to see her driving around town. You could only see the top of her head because she could hardly see over the dash. This past winter, after a rainstorm, Ken tried to dry out the trunk in the car and was shocked to find mold. No wonder she was having respiratory problems this past winter. Yes indeed, it was time to replace the cars.

Carol, Ken, and I were on hand to share this day with her. I documented it for those of you that were not able to be there. The pictures loaded exactly opposite of reality. I tried it twice but they loaded the same. The bottom picture shows Ethelyn with her salesman "Dana". The second picture is the writing of the check, and the handshake with the "Money Man". The last shows a happy Ethelyn driving away in her CRV (Carol and I helped her remember the type of car she has by telling her to the think "Christ Rose Victorously"'. She hasn't forgotten it since.

Congratulations Ethelyn - you deserve a smooth ride as you take the 40 plus miles, round trip , each day to spend time with daddy. Your visits mean the world to him even though he is unable to verbalize that to you.

Impact Benton

2009-06-18T20:46:00.006-05:00

Finally - I can see the end of the overcrowded tunnel I have been in the past few weeks. Impact Benton is over for now. It was awesome! Impact Benton had 218 people registered to work and they all worked very hard. Many used their vacation time from their jobs to come out and be the hands and feet of Jesus in our little town.

Volunteers from 12 different churches refurbished 6 homes, replaced windows on 2 more homes, painted a comunity sign welcoming people to the town of Benton, built a cover for a missionary working at a local park, washed 91 cars, reached out to over 150 children at Bible Schools at 4 different locations, gave bags of information and gifts to 3200 homes, and distributed 350 baskets to the elderly! What an outpouring of God's love over our small town. Below is the house that Ken's crew worked on. His crew, named "Goofy's Gang", did a wonderful job for a wonderful lady. I only have the before picture, I will post the after when I get one.

I am still here!

2009-05-30T07:51:00.002-05:00

Our church is currently involved in a community project called "Impact Benton" and it has totally consumed my "free" time. I am still, working 1/2 days, seeing daddy, and the rest is church volunteer work. The project kicks off next week and that should free me up some. Since I am involved in the organizing, I am hoping to have all my projects completed today.

Yesterday, daddy was great. He walked using the walker all around the unit. His speech was more slurred than usual but I won't be concerned unless it becomes the norm. I have yet to take a picture of him walking. I hope to do that soon. I have just forgotten to take the camera. My yard is in shambles, and it is getting HOT here. I hope to get it under control soon or have a sad yard all summer . : ( If I get the chance, I will post some pictures this afternoon. Ken is working today so this afternoon could be real quiet around here.

Until next time ---------

What next?

2009-05-22T21:44:00.002-05:00

Daddy was in a real good mood today. We had a good lunch and he was somewhat excited about walking after lunch. Shortly before lunch was over the CNA supervisor came over and told me that he needed to go to bed after lunch. They are concerned that he is sitting too much. I told her I was planning on taking him for walk, she said he had to go to bed because his "bottom" was red and they didn't want him to get sores. She was busy with the lunch crowd and I had an afternoon doctor's appointment so I didn't ask too many questions. I did ask if he had sores, she said no, just red spots. What does that mean? Wouldn't getting him out the chair and walking help? Why can't they get him up to walk occasionally so he isn't sitting all the time? Could it be red becuase he isn't being changed enough?
Luckily the CNA that was suppose to put him to bed was busy when daddy finished, so I had time to get him up for a short walk before they put him to bed.
I am planning on going early tomorrow so I will do some checking into this. I didn't want to "stir the pot" when I was unable to stay and wait for my answers. I will have plenty of time tomorrow. I am hoping Ken can go with me and I can get some pictures of him walking to post. He really is doing good.

Is that Evil among the Ivy

2009-05-20T23:36:00.003-05:00

UGHHHHHHHHHH! Any volunteers to rid my yard of poison ivy?

There are plants under the weeds!

2009-05-20T23:18:00.006-05:00

I made a quick trip around the yard and God has blessed my weed infested yard with tidbits of beauty. The rabbits have almost eaten the tomato plants in the garden. Hopefully we can get a fence up this weekend. If the tomatos don't come back, I will just chalk it up to another causality of my busy lifestyle. The grape tomatos on my deck are doing well. I took pictures of my babies. In the front I have some beautiful daylillies and hydrangas in bloom. This weekend I hope to find some time to weed and fertilize - wish me luck! My yard is always open to friends and family that wish to join the fun!

I must get some sleep!

2009-05-20T22:58:00.002-05:00

Wow I did something today that I have never done before.
The day started out perfectly normal - extraordinarily busy as usual. I went to work, left to feed daddy, bought some groceries, worked some more , then finally sat down to a short break around 4:00. I remember picking up a Bible study --- and then waking up and reading the time 6:15 on the clock. I jumped up in a frenzy - I was late for work and I have so much to do. I did the whole shower thing, ate breakfast, then sat down to catch up on the news. It was not until then that I realized it was 6:15pm on Wednesday NOT 6:15 am on Thursday! About the time I realized what had happened, my phone rang. It was my pastor (also my boss). I had missed church tonight - very unusual. When he asked if I was OK - all I could do was laugh uncontrollably.
I have felt for some time that my life was too busy, too hectic, no time for myself to unwind - but this is totally ridiculous. The 35+ miles back and forth to the Home is a lot to fit into an already over packed schedule, but I wouldn't trade the time with daddy for anything. I plan on getting some good sleep and hopefully tomorrow I will be a little more together.

Daddy did very well today. He did not say a word and wanted to hold my hand the entire time I was there. He ate pretty good at lunch - about 75%. Tomorrow I will try to get him up and do some walking with the walker - I'll let you know how that goes!

Rollercoaster Day

2009-05-19T22:45:00.011-05:00

Lately times have been the lowest of lows and the highest of highs. Today was a high day. I was so sad yesterday I did not get any sleep. I cried, I prayed, I cried, I prayed. I had to prepare myself mentally to see Daddy today. After talking to the therapist yesterday, the only words my brain hung on to were "The disease has progressed too far for us to help". I was too sad to visualize me seeing him without hugging him in tears.

As I was driving to the Home, God heard my prayers. I was at peace. When I saw Daddy, he smiled. We exchanged hellos, he reached out for my hand and said, "You're here". It was then that I knew everything would be fine. I helped him with lunch and we went out for a walk. While we were out the PT found us. She said she wanted to help me, help him. We went back to the PT room and she showed me how to get him to stand safely, and transfer to and from a room chair. As we began to talk we decided to try a walker again. When we tried this before and daddy would just push it aside. But today was a new day. We worked with him so he would hold the walker instead of putting his arm around me. When he got the hang of it, he took off. He was walking! I was so excited. My tears today were tears of joy. I held onto the belt around his chest, but other than that he was doing it on his own. The PT continued to guide me on the correct way to walk with him and how to keep him and myself safe in case he fell. She was so impressed by how well he was doing, she took us outside. We walked down the sidewalks and transferred into the car. This weekend, maybe we will be going on a field trip!!!!!!!! It will take me a while to get real comfortable with him, but we can learn together.

Perhaps the most touching thing for me was how concerned and patient the PT was with my desire to help him. Daddy tried to keep his arm around me, and always reached for my hand. She told me that shows how much he trusts me. It choked me up. I work with him so much knowing that he has no idea who I am -- or does he???

Today I am posting the pictures I talked about yesterday. These were taken a week and a half ago. We were hanging out and enjoying our visit and Ken challenged him to some basketball. What do you think?
Memory Moment:Tonight Ken and I went to Springhill. When we passed by the stadium it brought back memories of a High School football game many years ago. Mama and Daddy had traveled to Springhill to see my sister and I perform in the half-time show. I was on the flag line and this was perhaps one of my first performances. During the half-time show, as I was twirling my flag, the flag fell off the pole and there I was, on the field twirling a bare pole. After the show, my daddy went on to the field and retrieved my flag. I have no idea what thoughts were on his mind, but I loved him for caring so much to try to make everything ok for me.

Sad Day

2009-05-19T01:06:00.005-05:00

Daddy was evaluated today. He will not be receiving any physical therapy. He is not able to respond to directions from the PT and they don't feel they can help beyond where he is right now. I will be meeting with the PT evaluator tomorrow and she will show me some things I can do to slow down his progress and go over how the Alzheimer's is affecting his ability to walk and control his body movements.
I am continuing to pray for more good days for him. I am planning on taking him out again this weekend. I don't know where yet, but I enjoyed taking him out to the dentist. Even if we take him out for drive, it will be worth it.

I will post some pictures of one of his good days a few weeks ago tomorrow. I so want him to have more good days. I will spend most of tomorrow with him and I hope to see him smile, and hear him laugh and tell me he loves me. I will try not to cry. I am not ready to see Alzheimer's take him away from me. I miss my daddy.

2009-05-17T16:21:00.004-05:00

Yesterday was my daughter-in-love's birthday as well as her mothers. These are pictures of the cards I made for them. It was my first time to use the card feature with the Walk in Garden cartridge and I really like the way it turned out. It was easier that I thought.

Busy Day

2009-05-15T21:10:00.003-05:00

It is amazing how much you can get done in a day! This morning I did some church work at home, went to the office and worked about an hour, made a trip to the bank, and was out at the Home in time to take daddy to a 10:30 concert. After visiting daddy I went to the gym, came home and met some church members to make vinyl banners for the church. My evening with Ken was welcomed. We ate dinner, then hung out - I made Noah a card, he was trying to watch a Royals game but was entertained by "Rain Delay" stories.

Tomorrow is Joey's birthday so I can't show you the card I gave her, but I thought I would post some of the cards that I have already given out.

Wild Visit

2009-05-15T20:53:00.005-05:00

My visit with him today was a little strange. The 400 wing was having their floor waxed so the residents could not go into the common room. It was so strange to see the residents lined up in the hallways. I took daddy out to the main common room to enjoy a visiting singer so he got a break. I did inquire why none of the other 400 wing residents went to the concert and was informed that the CNA's are not allowed to take them out of the hall anymore. Apparently a resident got out recently and they have tightened up the regulations. When we returned from the concert, it was really chaotic. An air conditioner drain pipe busted and water flooded the TV room and a couple of resident rooms. Due to all the maintenance men being pulled to clean up the water, the dining hall was not ready by lunch. Their plan was to have everyone eat in the hall - I opted to take daddy's dinner to his room.

He was doing well today- real quiet. He was trying hard to stand but the 4 point belt is keeping him restrained. His legs are really like jello. I saw him when he got out of the shower and his legs just can't support him. I did go down and talked to the insurance lady and she cleared up some things. The reason daddy has no insurance to cover therapy is because his insurance will not cover PT that is done in a nursing home setting. Because of this, daddy will have to pay the entire cost. I told her that I want him evaluated and pending the outcome of the evaluation, we will determine if we want to proceed with the therapy. They offer PT, OT, and Speech. I will know Monday how much the evaluation will cost, but I want it done regardless. I will never know if he is able to gain any strength and control over his movements unless we get the evaluation.

Daddy First Field Trip

2009-05-14T22:26:00.004-05:00

Today Daddy had a dentist appointment. I was real nervous because we have not taken daddy out since he became a resident on March 4th. The trip went real well. He had a little trouble getting into the car. His instinct was to crawl in by putting his knees on the seat. I re-directed him and got him to re-stand, then helped him with his legs and the rest just fell into place. He seemed happy to get out. He was not anxious and I was very relieved.

After his doctor's appointment, we took him out to DQ for some ice-cream. We got him a blizzard and he had trouble with the spoon. In hindsight, we should have gotten him a shake. He "drink" his blizzard - good to the very last drop.

Can Life get any busier?????

2009-05-13T22:59:00.006-05:00

I am so overwhelmed right now. What day is is anyway???? Yesterday I did spend quite a bit of time with daddy. He was having a good day. The 4 point hip belt came in and it is working very well. The geri-chair is out of his room!
The lady I needed to talk to about the physical thearapy was not there yesterday and I didn't go today. I hope I can meet with her tomorrow and find out what is going on.
Tomorrow is a big day - Ethelyn and I are going to take daddy to the dentist. This will be his first trip out since he moved into the Home. I will have to remember to leave my heels at home --- tennis shoes tomorrow. I pray that the transition in and out of the car goes smoothly.

Tonight I went to First Place, a program at my church that focuses of getting healthy and losing weight. I have started a weight loss blog tonight and put a link on this page. Feel free to watch me win this battle - and please leave comments when you visit. I need you to hold me accountable.

Praying for Guidance

2009-05-12T02:28:00.004-05:00

Today was rainy - and down right ugly outside most of the day. I worked this morning then ran a few errands before I had to go to the doctor. Nothing is wrong, just a follow-up to see how my body is accepting the new meds and a check up on my wrists. Things went well.
I did not see daddy today but will spend most of tomorrow with him while Ethelyn goes to May Him at Camp Bethany. She called tonight for some guidance. When I talked to the RN supervisor I was told that daddy would get physical therapy. As it turns out, daddy's insurance will not cover the cost. I really don't understand because last time we requested an evaluation we were told they did not give therapy to maintain ability but will rehab if the patient was deteriated since coming him. Daddy moved in March 4th and he was walking. Now he is barely able to stand. He has been in the geri-chair so long and he has not been walking. Bottom line -Insurance will not cover sesions and there is also a concern that he may not respond or understand what they are doing. I will spend some time tomorrow getting some specifics. I want him to get the very best care - he deserves it.
Another issue is the medicine. His pills have gone up a lot since moving in. We were getting most of this pills at the VA and they were a few bucks. The Home will not allow us to bring his pills in, so we have to pay their high price. 3 of his pills are $25 a dose, but there is nothing we can do to cut costs, and he really needs his meds.
I am up late in order to have some quite time to pray for God's guidence in this matter. I ask that you pray about it as well. Hopefully I will have more info on how to help daddy tomorrow.

Ken is 50!

2009-05-09T23:25:00.004-05:00

Today was a good day. The pictures tell the story.

Visit with Daddy and preparing for Ken's Big"50"

2009-05-08T18:12:00.005-05:00

I spent the morning with daddy, then it was off to get groceries for Ken's birthday dinner. I plan on making his cake tomorrow while is off at the Air Show. Jared is coming to spend the weekend with us. It will be so good to see him. I am planning on staying home while the guys do the Air Show. Hopefully I can get caught up on some housework and get his cake and special dinner cooked.

Daddy was real quite today. When I got there he was in the geri-chair again (UUUGGGHHH) I quickly woke him up and had him transferred to his regular chair. I just couldn't stay in that wing today so we escaped.

We went walking through the home and dropped by for a little "bean bag baseball" and a slushy. He enjoyed that. I took him outside for a short while. He didn't say anything today but "That's good" in response to the slushy, and "I love you too baby" in response to me telling him goodbye and that I love him.

The pictures I am posting are from Tuesday. The Purple Heart group throws a birthday party for the residents once a month. Daddy has been going to these for a long time, long before he became a resident. Most of the guys know him. I thought you might like to see him being greeted by his longtime friends.

Catch-Up Day

2009-05-07T22:07:00.006-05:00

Today was a "Catch-Up" day for me. I worked this morning then met Ken for lunch at the house. It was so nice to have a little time to visit with him. We have gotten to the point that we only see each other when we are totally exhausted. After lunch, I got some laundry done, cleaned out the mile high mail stack, and tackled the refrigerator. If nothing else, the refrigerator was a true picture of when life stopped around here. I actually had unopened yogurt with "best by" date of "February". At some point, my vegetable drawer was invaded by alien produce monsters. The items that are still good are so random. I must pick up a package of tortillas every time I go to the store --- I have about 4 packages.
I have always took pride in making monthly meal plans and shopping for staples once a month and perishables once a week. I am a big list, organized type of person. Well-------------I can't remember when the last time I shopped with meals in mind. We have eaten more fast food meals in the past few months than I care to count. I have gained weight back, and I feel tired, depressed, and out of control. Luckily my last trip to the doctor seems to have helped the depression. At least I don't cry all th time, I don't even cry every day anymore. Oh well enough of the "PITY PARTY" Tomorrow is another day.
Ethelyn is taking tomorrow off to "Catch Up" so I will be with daddy. I do plan to come home in time to finish my house cleaning and pick up some things for the weekend meals. Ken's 50th Birthday is Saturday and Jared is coming in town. They will be going to the Air Show Saturday.
I know life is all about choices and I choose to have a great weekend. I want to smell Ken's apple spice cake baking, relax in a clean house, and dance around the house singing "Never Let Go" by Matt Redman all day Saturday. It is not a new song, but if you have never heard it, you need to. You can't help but sing out loud and dance. I posted a link on my favorite video list. No matter what life throws at you GOD WILL NEVER LET GO!

Mother's Day Card

2009-05-06T18:50:00.004-05:00

With all the rain I haven't been able to unwind by working in the yard so I have been busy making cards. Most are for May birthdays for family members so I won't post them too early ; ) This is the card I made for Ken to send to his mom for mother's day. I am trying to use more patterned paper and layering. I chose the 3 jewels because she had 3 children. I have several more to make so stay tuned, I will post them after I send them out.

Everything with daddy is the same - he looked good today. We walked and talked. His speech today was difficult to follow. He seemed to just enjoy holding my hand as he moved up and down the hall. I will miss seeing him tomorrow!

HANG ON !

2009-05-05T22:19:00.005-05:00

I couldn't help it, I had to post this picture. While I was writing my daily post on daddy, I looked up and saw this! Look close at the center pane of the window. I took a close up so you could see it better. TOO FUNNY! I guess God is trying to tell me to "Hang On".

Daddy Coming and Going

2009-05-05T21:43:00.009-05:00

Yea! He was moving all day! He only had one belt on when I got there so I went and got the other one. It was much more comfortable than having the one across his chest that he slides out of. I talked to the floor RN to see why it is so hard for the CN to put his belts on. She said the problem is because he can't have two belts. According to state regulations he is only allowed one restraint for the same problem. I expressed my feelings about the state regulations in a calm manner (which was difficult). I was proud of my restraint. She took me to the RN supervisor and I listened to her explanation then responded by asking her "So what are you going to do to help him" The floor nurse stayed with me and agreed with my concerns and told the RN supervisor all the things we have tried. The outcome of our meeting is what Ethelyn and I have wanted all along. An evaluation by the Physical Therapists, and a custom device to meet his needs. The last time we requested PT, we were told he didn't qualify for physical therapy because he could walk and they couldn't give therapy to maintain his ability to walk. Now that he has been in the geri-chair and is unable to walk, he qualifies. It is so great to see state run facilities in action! The bottom line is, he should be getting evaluated, and help provided. Praise the Lord. I will continue to be his advocate and I hope they understand my "persistence" is out of concern for daddy, not a criticism of their work.

Peaceful time in the yard

2009-05-04T18:43:00.004-05:00

What a peaceful walk in the yard. When you have days like I had today, I needed some time to calm down. As I walked around looking at all the flowers, I am so amazed at the beauty of God's creation. I was able to view new flowers in bloom, as well as flowers still blooming after reaching their peek this winter. As I was walking, I found myself humming the old gospel --- He Walks With Me in my mind over and over again.

I posted some pictures of a purple and a blue pansy that are still hanging in there. It is hard to believe they are still so pretty this late in the spring. I can't bear to redo the beds as long as they are willing to keep living. I also showed the tragic end to a beautiful hanging pansey plant that I had on the deck. We had some pretty strong storms come through this past weekend and it was too much for this little guy.

The Stella daylily is so beautiful right now. The plant is loaded with blooms and should really come to life in the next few days. God is so good!

Frustrated - But Hanging in There

2009-05-04T17:35:00.003-05:00

With all the work we did getting daddy out of the geri-chair this weekend I couldn't believe what I saw when I got there today. I found him asleep, in the geri-chair. He had no activity today. They said he slept all day. I tried to wake him but all he wanted to do was sleep.

I worked with him all weekend to get him moving so why was he back in the geri-chair????? I talked to the aids and the RN and got 3 responses

Shrugged shoulder and "I dont know" ~ isn't that the excuse we all love to hear
they didn't know how to put the straps on ~ aren't they the professionals??????
last but not least - We have to watch him when he is in the regular chair!!!!!!

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. He fell out of the geri-chair while trying to stand up so I hope they are watching him when he is in that chair too.
After about an hour, Ethelyn and I finally go someone to help us put him in the regular chair. I tried to get him to walk the chair and I received the same blank stare I got Saturday. Daddy told me "I don't know what you want me to do." He was weak, confused, and had to learn all over again. With patience he began to walk again. He was moving independently when I left. Ethelyn stayed to feed him supper. I will be there tomorrow to feed him his lunch and I hope I don't see him in the geri-chair. I realize the disease has him going down mentally, but he is going down physically very fast. He needs movement, he needs to get his strength back. I will continue to work with him every day I am there.

Well that is enough venting today -- I am going to go get on my jeans and take a stroll in the yard. I noticed some daylilies are blooming. We also bought some bushes to form a hedge along a chain link fence in the backyard. Ken is going to plant a few this evening. I wll be sure and take some pictures.

Moving Right Along

2009-05-03T17:00:00.003-05:00

Ken and I went down to see Daddy after church today. Apparently the evening shift had put him in the geri-chair when he woke up this morning. The nurse in charge said daddy tried to stand and fell out. He injured his left elbow again. It seems anytime he falls, he lands on that elbow. The put him in his wheelchair but only used one stap. We looked around, got another strap and I showed the nurse how to strap him in. This worked and he was off and walking in the chair once again. The head RN will be back tomorrow and I will show her how we crisscrossed the belts. I only hope this continues to work, but you never know. He does seem content and has not tried to get out of it yet. I will take the camera down tomorrow and take some pictures of him ---- if I can catch him!

Memory moments: About a year ago we were going out to eat lunch at a local Chinese restuarant and daddy had to go to the restroom. Ken got up to go with him. Daddy stopped before they had reached the men's. Daddy then started to go into the women's. Ken told daddy that they couldn't go in there because it was the womens and they might get arrested. Daddy shrugged his shoulders and with a chuckle, told Ken "It might be worth it". Ken laughed so hard - he was still laughing when they returned.

Some Progress

2009-05-02T15:11:00.003-05:00

I spent the morning with daddy. I took the chair - with the new cushion and belts. He was able to move around - which is progress. However, the cushion was a little too high for him. His short legs could barely touch the ground. I wonder where I get the short legs from?????? He was able to get around though and we made some progress.
I was amazed that he lost all memory of walking. I started him from scratch. While he was sitting, I would physically move his leg for him and repeat - heal, toe, push. We did this over and over. He worked very hard. His tendency was to only push backward. After about an hour and half, walking (in the chair) up and down the halls, he finally caught on. He was talking to people, looking much happier. He walked until luch was served.
During lunch, his body was in constant movement. He kept telling me he wanted to walk. He didn't eat much, but he drank a lot. It was very hot in the wing because 1 AC is down. When Ethelyn got there, he told me "How much do I have to pay since she is here now". I told him he didn't need to pay me, that I was his daughter. He never realized that and he repeated several times that he wanted to pay me the right amount. When I told him I had to go he said 'What about my chair." I tried to assure him that Ethelyn would take over and I would see him tomorrow. It is heartbreaking that after spending 4 hours with him, he had no clue who I was. The important thing is that he spent the morning out of the geri-chair and moving his legs. I didn't take any pictures today because we were too busy.

On A Mission Today

2009-05-01T21:17:00.006-05:00

Today I spent some time with daddy. When I got there he had "scooted" himself out his chair again and onto the floor. His new cushion had come in and that makes 2 cushions, and 2 belts they have ordered to try to keep him in his chair. Because the home is state funded, they are limited to where they can order accessories. I was on a mission from that point. I have found a 4 point hip belt that his RN will be showing the home doctor and if they cannot order it, we will order it ourselves. In the meantime, Ken and I have made him a "custom" wedge. We will use 3 belts - 1 to strap it to the bottom of his chair, 1 to strap him to the chair, and 1 strap to strap the 2 together. Hopefully this will work. I picked up his heavier chair and put his name of the back. My cricut is so handy! I use it for so many things, not just making cards. I am posting a picture of his chair, and the door to get into his wing. The home is so lovely. The center is a round area that all 4 doors to the various wings branch off of. He is in Wing 4 and it is a secure wing so their door has to stay closed and locked at all times. It is right next to a beautiful bronze eagle. I thought you might want to see it. I will spend tomorrow morning with him and I hope the "homemade" cushion works! I'll be sure and post the results.

Flowers in Bloom

2009-05-01T21:03:00.003-05:00

Yesterday was a busy day. The devils best friend "Chaos" was around every corner. It was nice to come home, take a tour of my yard and notice flowers in bloom in almost every bed. I was able to overlook the weeds that need to be pulled and just enjoy God's beauty. I love the yellow iris. My mother loved purple irises but they are not blooming yet. I do have purple petunias in a planter in front of the yellow irises in my side bed. The red Gerber Daisy and pink Azaleas are in my front flower bed and the pot of marigolds are on my back deck. I hope you can appreciate the joy I get from seeing the results from my novice gardening skills. Only God can turn meager skills into such beauty.

Thank You Card

2009-04-29T23:26:00.004-05:00

I couldn't sleep so I made a card to take up to the Home next week. I plan on giving cookies, or some sort of treat to the people that care for daddy on the 4th of every month. Daddy moved in on March 4th, 2009. I made a card last month, but did not take a picture. Like I said earlier in my blog, I need to get some lessons on taking pictures that show the card more clearly. Feel free to make a comment and let me know how to do better with the picture taking. I would love some pointers. Anyway this is the card. The stamp I put on the front says "We do not remember days, We remember moments." I will write a personal note on the inside letting them know how much I appreciate them as they help daddy with the moments of his day.

I Love Rabbits but............

2009-04-29T22:29:00.004-05:00

When I finally got home tonight around 7:30 Ken and I dashed out to the backyard to check on the tomatoes. We were running trying to beat the rain. I was shocked as I stood there getting wet looking for the blooms on my Early Girl plant. THEY WERE GONE! No doubt, one of our long eared friends ate it for lunch. I guess this weekend, I will have to put some sort of a fence around it. The grape tomato plant on the patio is getting huge. I will have to stake it soon. Thank goodness all the blooms are still there --------- but there is always tomorrow. Oh how I love rabbits ------ when they are not eating my tomatoes!

Quiet Day

2009-04-29T21:40:00.007-05:00

Daddy was asleep when I got there. I was so looking forward to a fun day like yesterday. I brought him a coke and he smiled when he saw it and took a drink before going back to sleep. He had just gotten out of the shower and that usually makes him grumpy. I asked Rebecca (one of the nurses) and she said he was actually well behaved this morning. He held my hand for 2 hours and didn't move. I chose to let him sleep.

I was visiting with another resident sitting at our table who appeared to be having trouble staying awake as well. We joked that he may need some coffee. While drinking his coffee he stopped mid-way to his mouth and stayed that way. I asked him if he wanted his coffee, he replied yes, but didn't move. Shortly afterward the RN came to tell him she didn't like his vitals and she wanted him to go lie down. The Home's Dr. came and shortly afterward, he was taken away by ambulance. Please pray for him. I will not post residents names for their privacy.

Shortly afterward, daddy woke up for his lunch. When I was getting his food prepared for him, he looked at it and said "Well that looks enticing". His vocabulary sometimes amazes me. He had just started eating when Ethelyn came in. I left for work, and she finished lunch with him. Today was farm day and they brought in horses, chickens, dogs etc. into their little side yard. Ethelyn said daddy liked the animals, but he loved the watermelon they served! I wish I could have been there to take some pictures and spend that time with him.

The pictures I took today were taken in the dining room. I took pictures of our hands, because that is pretty much what we did today. I haven't worked on the pictures I took yesterday in his room yet.

Fun Day

2009-04-28T23:49:00.004-05:00

I got to spend the afternoon with daddy. He was asleep when I got there so Ethelyn and I were able to spend some time visiting. We haven't done much of that since she moved out. We are always busy with daddy or on "shift change" mode. It was good to just sit down and visit.
She said daddy actually said, "Where's my daughter" several times. That surprised me, because I haven't heard him say the word daughter since before Christmas and he has never responded when I tell him I am his daughter. When he woke up, I went over to give him a kiss and he smiled real big, and began to laugh. He wasn't up long and during that time I was tring to take his picture but they didn't turn out very well. I will try to photoshop some to post, but I think I will try to take some more tomorrow. I will spend the morning with him and he does so much better in the morning. When I told him good-bye, he went to kiss me and instead he whispered for me to bring him a treat ------- so I will, just don't know what yet.

Memory moment. While I was in Ken's office earlier this evening, I began to have a memory of daddy when he was living here. He was up wondering, like he did most days at dusk, and he wondered into Ken's office. He sat at the desk, and in his mind, he was at Sears. He asked me what was wrong with my car and wanted me go start it up. For the next few days he was always asking us if the car would start. During dinner he was still asking us over and over again if the car would start. Ken told daddy he would go see. He got up from the table, went outside and came back in and told him the car started right up. Daddy was content and began to eat supper. He didn't mention it again until much later and we had to do the entire senario again.

Hectic Day

2009-04-27T16:09:00.005-05:00

I didn't get to see daddy today. Things at the church went -------well, kinda crazy. I won't go into detail, but it had something to do with flying cockroaches. I know, enough said. By the time I got home to take a shower, it was too late to go see him.

I did talk to Ethelyn. He is not having a good day today. Very stubborn. Would not eat, would not let them weigh him, doing everything to get out of his chair....etc. We have some bad weather coming in so she left about 3 and he was really not a happy camper when she left. Hopefully they were able to settle him down. I haven't seen him since Saturday when we took him his chair. I plan on going to spend the afternoon with him tomorrow -------- if the cockroaches let me!

Baby Girl Card

2009-04-26T01:08:00.007-05:00

Just wanted to post a card. I made a couple of these cards for friends at church that had grandbabies this past week. They were both baby girls! I am new at card making, and I hope to document my progression. There are some embellishments I could have added but I am still very limited in resources. I am using paper, stamps, etc that are left over from my teaching days. I have bought a few new things and that helps. I am almost embarrassed to show my basic cards, there are so many talented people on the blogs. As the old saying goes - "You gotta start somewhere". Well this card is my start!

It was much harder to take a picture that I thought. The stamps didn't show up well. I guess I need to add photography to my list of things to learn to do!

Things are blooming!

2009-04-26T00:40:00.008-05:00

Today was a great day to work in the yard. Temps were in the high 70's, low 80's and the sun was high in the sky. I still have quite a bit of weeding to do in a couple of my flower beds and I better get to it before it really gets out of hand. I took some pictures of my tomatoes. I have flowers showing up on my Early Girl and Grape tomatoes----- I know I have to do some pinching, but I just hate it when they are babies! They are still so small the marigolds look huge next to the tomatoes.

God is so awesome. These plants were barely noticable when they were put in the ground, and they have the potential to bear such wonderful tomatoes in a few short months. It makes me wonder what is my potential in the next 90 days? Will I live up to my potential? Will I not waste a moment of the time I have to serve others and take care of myself so I can be the best I can be?

Memories of Daddy

2009-04-26T00:05:00.003-05:00

Today Ken and I were able to go up and be with Daddy for lunch. He fed himself, which is really good. Ken was taking him his chair and we stopped by to get him a coke - he always loves to get coke.
Since I am just starting this blog, I thought I would write some memories I have had of Daddy while they are fresh in my mind. Before he moved in with us, I knew he was getting worse but not accepting how far his disease had progressed. I sat with him every Sunday during church service, and any other event that was held at our church. I took him and a friend to the VA every Wednesday morning. I was lucky some weeks because I was able to be with him while Ethelyn ran errands. Those times with my dad are irreplaceable. Those are memories that I will cherish all the days of my life.
As I began to see his memory failing him, I have memories of our one on one talks. One day we were sitting on our front porch and daddy was talking about the days when I was a child. He was talking about raising cattle, and bailing hay. I was able to converse with him on the topic and he turned to me confused and asked, "How are you so smart?" I replied, "Because I am your daughter." I saw tears weld up in his eyes and he said, "How can I not know that?" Then he was gone again. It was hard, but that is his life now.
I remember times when he was beginning to not recognize me. I would have to say "I am your Winona Lynn" then he would usually reply, "I have a Winona Lynn at home". There was no way he could relate me to the little girl he had in his memory. He would laugh when I told him "I am your red on the head" that is one line he would always laugh at.
When he moved in with Ken and I the beginning of January 2009, he was more confused than ever. He was unable to care for his personal needs, he was very dependant. I am so blessed that I was able to be a part of caring for him on a daily basis. The nights he was up all night I would lay my head on his shoulder and tell him, "Daddy, I am so tired, hold me so I get some sleep". He would always put his arm around me, and tell me to go to sleep. He would be quiet for a while, then we would play the senario in his head all over again. I really learned to cherish the small gaps of time when he would seem to find something familiar and comforting when I was around. We laughed and talked long hours during those nights. I remember when my grandmother lost the ability to speak and that is what kept me going. I don't ever want to lose his voice in my head. Listening to the same stories, same memories over and over again were music to my ears, not to be taken for granted.
I have had many sad days in my life but the day we took daddy to the Veterans Home was one of the hardest. He has been there 7 weeks and 4 days and I still have the pain, the feeling of loss. I see him as much as I can - almost everyday and every day I leave him I want to bring him home. He has progressed since he has been in the home, but I can't say he wouldn't have progressed at the same rate if he was at home. Ethelyn spends most days up there with him and we try to work together to make sure he is not alone much during the day. I hope to share the memories of spending time with him. I think it is important not to lose the days he has. I only wish I would have started writing earlier, so I would have the memories written.
Today when I told him good-bye, and I love you, he puckered his lips to give me a kiss and gave me the reply I so long to hear every time I have to leave him- "I love you too baby".

Why am I doing a Blog?

2009-04-25T20:12:00.004-05:00

My mind is firing on so many levels and I don't know where to start. The areas of my life seem to be all divided. I am helping care for my dad who is in a Veterans Home, working part-time for my church, running a household - I really enjoy cooking and cleaning :). I also like to spend time with my husband of 28 years and our three children and grandson who all live out of town. My faith is very important to me, and I spend a lot of time at my church. In my spare time (joke), I like to garden and have recently started making cards. As you can tell, there just isn't enough hours in a day. I hope to bring it all together as I share my life through this blog. Please feel free to respond to my posts - I need all the encouragement and advice you can give me.